Carlos cleaned his hands furiously in the sink, regretting the aftermath of a five hour data processing marathon. His hands were caked in sweat, and cold water just wasn't enough to calm the constant ache, ache, ache. In the background, Jessi mopped at a steady pace, removing all traces of the recent toilet breakdown. It was the third time that the things had overflown that week. Calling a repair hand seemed like a cruel trick; he would only think that it was his call to "duty". Although at this point in the budget she had convinced herself that she wasn't exactly above a quick romp if it meant getting a free repair, she was already carrying Johnny's baby, so that was out. And although someone had to have figured out by now that Carlos and Julian were living with her, if not a prospective father, she wanted to keep things under tight wraps for as long as was humanly possible. So no flaunting. "What is it?"
"Have you ever thought about moving to a bigger place?"
Jessi frowned. There was no room in her wallet for such a large change. Still, it would be nice if everything in the house didn't break down every five seconds. Old appliances plus a continuous stream of rambunctious kids was a faulty equation to begin with.
"I mean, technically, I can. Delilahs have before; as long as I remained relatively unnoticed during the move, it should be fine. But I don't exactly have money for that right now."
He patted his face, half listening to his patron and half wondering if he should change out of his pajamas anytime soon. "I'm just spitballing here, but couldn't you just sell the house and most of the stuff inside of it for the funds? People'll pay higher if you lived in it. It's already practically a landmark."
She stood in the doorway, speechless. Good old Carlos was blessed with more common sense then she could ever hope to obtain. To the internet!
While she had known through Carlos' crystal ball that that her ad for the one and only Delilah home would become popular, she hadn't exactly relied on having this many replies, especially so soon after posting. But she was soon presented with a dilemma, one that she hadn't considered until this point - how was she going to sort out the people who wanted to gawk at her home from the legitimate, serious buyers? Pawing through the offers, she finally settled on a man by the name of Hensley Duke. After doing a little background research on the man, she learned that he worked at Safehollow Labs. Jessi thought that she might have remembered that name from the top of Carlos' workpapers, the ones she was always finding sprawled across the house when she was cleaning. Perhaps he or Julian knew him? In a few short chat sessions, she scheduled a meeting with the man to inspect the home tomorrow during school hours, and figured she'd ask the two then - after all, Jessi already planned on having them guard the home in case "Dukes" wasn't who he claimed to be.
Noticing the time, she left for bed, wanting to prepare for the long day ahead.
---
"Did you say Hensley Duke?" Carlos enthused. Even Julian had a slight smile on his face, something Jessi hadn't seen since his charming demeanor had all but vanished upon gaining admittance to her home.
"Oh, so you two know him?"
"Know him?" Julian piped up. "My dear, the man is quite respectable. I don't just know him, I work under him, learn from him, have bonded with him..."
"Alright, Julian, I get it. You've known the professor longer than me. No need to rub into my face." Carlos was clearly ruffled, and maybe even a bit flushed.
"Wait a second, the professor? The guy you were talking about on my porch when you first came here?"
Julian nodded, clearly ignoring Carlos' remark. "He is responsible for the biology department at Safehollow Laboratories, and has been studying your family for quite a while."
"And he wants my house?"
Carlos jumped at the opportunity to get a word in edgewise. "Yeah, well, this place is probably a warehouse of information. It's been in your family for a while now, hasn't it? There's probably all sorts of things that he could study here, even if you took half of your stuff with you."
Jessi wasn't entirely sure what a few leaky toilets and abandoned toys could tell a man about the inner affairs of the Delilah household, but the offered money spoke louder than reason. "So if it's really him coming to the home, you guys will definitely be able to tell?"
Somewhere in the distance, the doorbell rang. Carlos smiled. "Let's find out."
A quick look out of the house window told Carlos everything that he needed to know. The man standing outside was unmistakably the dearest professor. And wouldn't Julian be thrilled to see him? At any rate, Jessi was in for a surprise.
"Carlos, m' boy!" the professor boomed, elated to see one of his favorite students. "So good to see you in the flesh after all of this time! The lab just isn't the same without you, kid!"
Carlos laughed. "I'm glad that you're happy to see me, professor, but isn't there someone you'd like to visit more? You don't have to entertain me."
The man blushed, grumbling under his breath. "Boy, you know me too well...but Jessi won't mind, right?"
He shrugged. "I'm sure that she'll be okay with it. I mean, I never saw anything in her that would've made me think otherwise."
"Good! Now, can I come in?"
When the professor hung up his coat, he couldn't help but prod Carlos. "So, how are you and Julian...getting along?"
Carlos hesitated, then sighed. "Same old, same old."
He whistled. "You know, I put the two'a you on this project together in the hopes that the man would learn to get along with other people. He gets quite sensitive, I'll have you know! One time when we were making a library visit..."
Carlos did not want to hear about this part of their relationship. He walked a little faster into the living room, hoping to end the conversation.
Before he even had a chance to make introductions or explain anything to Jessi, the two lovebirds were already at it. The minute that they had made eye contact, Carlos knew that it was all over.
"Did you miss me, sweetie?" the professor cooed, pressing his lips into an uncharacteristic pout. Carlos felt like a bird watcher, observing colorful mating rituals in a foreign land. Jessi was dumbfounded.
Julian grabbed the professor's hands and giggled, a sound that completely caught Jessi off guard. It sounded like a cat choking to death on a slab of salmon. "Um, hello, Mister..." she started.
Carlos scratched his head, knowing that the two were miles away and would never hear her. At least they weren't kissing yet...
And there it was. Carlos didn't mind seeing couples kiss, of course. But the professor and Julian's kisses often got...messy. He motioned to Jessi to avert her eyes, not wanting her to make the same mistake.
At the climax of their shenanigans and in the wake of a few choice phrases Jessi was glad the kids weren't around to hear, Julian grabbed a hold of the professor's head and teetered around the room slowly. "I'm never letting go," Julian whispered into his lover's ear. Jessi was only slightly skeeved out by the sudden change in personality. Judging by how freely they were acting in her living room, it was safe to say that the two had most certainly "bonded" at some point in private. Tentatively, she broke the moment, looking to get the show on the road.
"Er, Mister Hensley? Sorry to interrupt, but I'm Jessi Delilah? Owner of the house?"
He regretfully pulled away away from Julian's grasp, and suddenly, the air became formal and weighted. He was back to business in almost the blink of the eye. "A pleasure, I'm sure." He gracefully extended his hand. "Carlos has probably told you that I run the Safehollow Biology lab. Let's take a walk around the house, shall we? Not you, Julian," he said sternly, "You stay here and play nice with Carlos. Me and Jessi have a few things to discuss."
As the two inspected the nurseries, Jessi was bombarded with questions both biologic and anthropological in nature. Why it was important how often she cooked meals for her family, and her preferred method of birth, and her experiences as a child, well, she was sure he could gleam some meaning from them, but the entire business had her feeling caged, like a zoo animal.
Even worse was when morning sickness finally struck, and after emerging from the bathroom, how he was immediately interested in just how often she vomited, the texture of the vomit, and et cetera. Gross.
"I hope that you don't think that I am being nosy," he finally apologized after a fifth run-around of the kitchen, "It's just, well, this conversation is quite literally the chance of lifetime. We've been sending scientists to your motherline for years, and you are the first to have ever accepted to an observation."
"Really? My mother never mentioned that."
"There probably was not reason to. I imagine that your house attracts such a quantity of riff riff that any encounter would have slipped her mind."
"You'd be right." she groaned. Another round of vomit was making its way up her throat.
As Jessi crouched in the bathroom, she was aware of Hensley's weight on the bathroom door, casually leaning on his shoulder.
"Are you doing okay in there?"
"Never been better", she responded sarcastically.
"Right, well, we both know that I simply must buy the house. Unless of course you've been considering any other offers?"
She thought about lying and saying yes in an attempt to get him to double his original amount. But that seemed wrong. "Nope, it's just you, yourself, and your's."
"Good, good. So before we deal with transactions and the like, I was wondering if you could answer one more question?"
Jessi wiped her mouth and exited the stall. "Shoot."
"How exactly was your relationship with your mother?"
The air was cold.
No comments:
Post a Comment